Posted by: mrtweeds | March 16, 2009

no, thank you anyway.

saturday my parents were kind enough to watch the kids for the day so william and i (gasp!) actually went out and had an entire day to ourselves!

we didn’t do anything remotely exciting, if you’re a normal person, but it was exciting to us: we window shopped. we window shopped and wandered and even tried a few things on in a mall.

you see, generally this type of thing doesn’t happen when you’ve got a couple of kids under the age of 5 for a very simple reason: they have no patience for any sort of adult time in a shopping world. if it doesn’t involve toys or books or toys, why is time being spent on it?

so we relished our time together, went into dressing rooms (not together…that wasn’t part of the relishing), ate lunch at a table for two, and appreciated it.


except we also quickly realized that when you don’t have the melting down children or even a gigantic stroller to act as a buffer…well, then all those people at kiosks in the middle of the mall trying to force samples upon you, make you switch cell phone plans, sell you hair extensions…well, they see you as fair game.

but here’s the thing…as we were walking along, trying to look absorbed in conversation and/or in a hurry in order to avoid these people, one of them would not be stopped. and he looked something like this:


for the record, i did not take this picture. i got it off of wikipedia when i looked up “public domain pic of clown”. i am sure that this clown is a very nice, very kind man who just wants to bring joy to people’s hearts by dressing up in loud clothing, painting his face with red and white and black makeup, wearing a straw-like blond wig, and gluing a pig like nose over his real one.

but the clown who zeroed in on us didn’t look quite so…friendly. maybe it was his hunched over stature as he clung to his rickety stool, maybe it was his nicotine stained fingers, maybe it was just the rasp of his voice that sounded like he’d been in the bar a bit too late last night as he called out  to my loving husband “hey buddy! hey buddy! flower for your girlfriend?” as he waved a poorly made balloon flower in our general direction.

but even though we smiled politely and said “no, thank you anyway” and continued walking, we weren’t fast enough to avoid hearing his parting words:

“c’mon, flower for your girlfriend? it’d be an even swap.

and that’s when we decided that it was time to leave.



  1. I hate clowns!

  2. Wow, that sounds pretty scary! Funny you should take the picture of this clown to illustrate it. He’s pretty famous in hOlland and thereabouts for being part of the duo ‘Bassie and Adriaan’. I, like many children grew up with them and loved them.
    Now, in my adult life I find him pretty scary. Not only because he turns out not to be a very nice man and was convicted of tax fraud but just because, well.. clowns are scary!

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